ABOUT THE BOOK
Title: SIZE MATTERS
Author: Alison Bliss
Series: A Perfect Fit, #1
On Sale: November 29, 2016
Mass Market: $5.99 USD
eBook: $5.99 USD
The rules of (fake) engagement . . .
Leah Martin has spent her life trying to avoid temptation. But she’s sick of low-fat snacks, counting calories, and her hyper-critical mom. Fortunately, her popular new bakery keeps her good and distracted. But there aren’t enough éclairs in the world to distract Leah from the hotness that is Sam Cooper – or the fact that he just told her mother that they’re engaged . . . which is a big, fat lie.
Sam sometime speaks before he thinks. So what started out as defending Leah’s date-ability to her judgmental mother soon turned into having a fiancée! Now the plan is to keep up the fake engagement, stay “just friends,” and make Leah’s family loathe him enough to just call the whole thing off. But Sam has an insatiable sweet tooth, not only for Leah’s decadent desserts but her decadent curves. Her full lips. Her bright green eyes. Yep, things aren’t going quite according to plan. Now Sam has to convince Leah that he’s for real . . . before their little lie turns into one big, sweet disaster.
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THE A PERFECT FIT SERIES
Size Matters, #1
On The Plus Side, #2
Leah Martin nearly choked on her beer.
“What do you mean just pick one?” Her eyes scanned the entire bar before settling back on her friend. “Pick one what?”
“A guy, of course.”
Yeah, because it was just that simple. For Valerie, maybe. Even though they were close in size, Valerie always wore her weight better and turned heads everywhere she went. It probably helped that she had expressive doe eyes, wavy platinum-blond hair, and looked more like a cutesy toy poodle any guy would give their right testicle to take for a walk.
“I hate to tell you this, Val, but that only applies to women who look like you.” If Leah had to classify herself in that same frame of reference, she’d accurately describe herself as a Bulldog. Not only did she have the breed’s innate stubborn streak, but she also had the matching broad shoulders, wide hips, large chest, and—if she didn’t lose a few pounds—probably the same short life span. “Hippy brunettes with body image issues and smudged eyeliner don’t get the luxury of just pick one.”
“Oh, shut up,” Valerie said, rolling her eyes. “Your eyeliner looks fine.”
Yep, that about sums it up. My eyeliner is the only thing that looks decent on me tonight.
The little black dress she wore was just that—too little—and was slowly squeezing the life out of her. Especially after packing on ten extra pounds in the last few months. The sheath of fabric clung to every curve, as well as every bulge. Thank God they lived in Texas instead of Alaska or an Eskimo might’ve mistaken her for a seal and tried to skin her.
“So what’s your pleasure?” Valerie asked, not giving up. “Plenty of gorgeous men in here tonight.”
“Sure, if I squint.”
“Okay, stop being negative. You’re gorgeous, and lots of men love curvy women. I should know. Now pick one.”
No point in arguing with her. Once Valerie set her mind to something, she didn’t stop until the mission was accomplished. But the only time Leah had ever had her pick of anything was when she stood in front of the doughnut case at work, deciding between a chocolate éclair or a cream cheese danish.
“How am I supposed to know who to pick? It’s not like they wear signs on their foreheads saying, ‘I dig fat chicks.’”
Valerie shot her an exasperated look. “We’ll just establish a baseline for the kind of guy you want.”
“The kind of guy I’d want wouldn’t be hanging out in a bar called Rusty’s Bucket. In fact, I wouldn’t be here either if you hadn’t forced me to come.”
“Leah, you got dumped. Happens to all of us sooner or later.” Valerie’s voice softened as she reached for Leah’s hand. “It sucks, I know. But you’re always at work or upstairs in your apartment, which means you never leave that damn building. It’s not healthy. You can’t hide out forever.”
“I’m not hiding. I’ve just…been busy. I never imagined I’d be this swamped only a month after grand opening, and I’ve had to put in a lot of extra hours.” Leah caught Valerie’s I’m-not-buying-it expression. “Come on, Val. The wedding is tomorrow night. Everything has to be perfect because…well, you know.”
Valerie rolled her eyes. “Why does it even matter?”
“Because my reputation is at stake. It’s my cake the happy couple will be stuffing into each other’s mouths. They can choke on it for all I care, but it’s going to be the tastiest damn wedding cake they’ve ever eaten while keeling over. Everything has to go as smoothly as possible, and I have a million things to do before tomorrow night. I still need to—”
Valerie raised her hand to stop her from continuing. “What you need is a break. Let’s find some guys to dance with and have a few hours of fun before you lock yourself up in the cave again. Just humor me, okay? Now, what would say your dream guy’s most attractive quality would be?”
Leah sighed. “A pulse.”
“No vampires. Check. What else?”
“I don’t know. This is stupid.” Leah caught the disappointment in Valerie’s eyes and groaned. “Okay, fine. I guess I’d want…”
Her gaze sifted through the crowd, landing on two men at the bar. While the one standing motioned to the bartender, the other rolled up the sleeves of his blue button-down shirt, drawing Leah’s attention to his tanned, muscular forearms. When he finished, he bumped his elbow against the other man’s ribs and said something that made them both laugh. The warm, amused smile he wore sent a zing of pleasure through Leah, like she’d been given a intravenous shot of serotonin. Him. I’d want him.
Ever read a book that just made you feel good? Made you laugh out loud enough that your dog looked at you funny and your husband came in to see what was so funny? Yep, this book is that and more. I’ve already decided that it is the BEST ROM-COM of the year on this blog. I’ve never laughed so much and in the same breath, cried. Yes, cried.
You see, I had the hyper-critical mother that harped on my weight my whole laugh. I’m almost 50 years old and she STILL does it from time to time. I swear listening to Leah’s mother was like reliving my teen years through to my marriage at 38. I told my mother one time that she wanted a Sorority Barbie doll but instead, she got a daughter that liked cars, sports but could also clean up, too. I understood when Leah made remarks about herself and then laughed it off. Leah is/was ME!!!! It wasn’t until I met my now husband that I fully understood the pain, the abuse that I endured and the non-self worth that I had. I’m not fully healed but I will say, the love of a good man helps.
That’s where Sam comes in. Talk about someone that can.not keep his mouth shut. I swear he had trench mouth the number of times that he had “foot in mouth” with Leah. I can attest that my husband never said anything like that but he does appreciate my assets, just like Sam. Oh and the things that he does to Leah in bed? Holy mother! Bring a cold drink…you will need it.
What really got me in the book was the humorous dialogue. I swear to you that I’ve never laughed so hard reading a book. It was so very real, funny as hell and then it would get so emotional. Leah and Sam are a couple that you know are destined to be together but between all their inner thoughts, meddling families and not to mention their friends Max and Valerie…it takes a while for them to realize it.
The ending is just PERFECT!! My one complaint, I wanted an epilogue but hopefully in Valerie and Max’s book 😉 we will get that.
Run, don’t walk, don’t even think about it, buy this book. Read this book. Laugh out loud until you almost wet yourself and then squirm and sigh. Ms. Bliss has written the best and most perfect Romantic Comedy of the year! And you can quote me on that.
ABOUT THE AUTHOR
Alison Bliss grew up in Small Town, Texas, but currently resides in the Midwest with her husband and two sons. With so much testosterone in her home, it’s no wonder she writes “girl books.” She believes the best way to know if someone is your soul mate is by canoeing with them because if you both make it back alive, it’s obviously meant to be. Alison pens the type of books she loves to read most: fun, steamy love stories with heart, heat, laughter, and usually a cowboy or two. As she calls it, “Romance…with a sense of humor.”
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